- There are more unmarried people in the US than married, which is sometimes presented as problematic.
- But research shows that we are not living in a society of lonely narcissists.
- In fact, a number of studies find that being single can actually contribute your success in life.
When my mother was my age, she told me, if you were a single woman filling out official documents, you would have to mark yourself down as a “spinster.”
Really. That was the legal term for an unmarried woman in England until very recently. Spinster.
The word certainly doesn’t inspire much optimism in a single woman’s prospects.
Things have changed quite a bit since then.
In the US, people are getting hitched less often than they once did, and young Americans are putting off marriage more than ever before.
In 1962, half of 21-year-olds and 90% of 30-year-olds had been married at least once. In 2014, only 8% of 21-year-olds and 55% of 30-year-olds had been married.
Single Americans are now the majority.
But that doesn’t mean that the single life isn’t still wrapped in stigma.
As New York University sociologist Eric Klinenberg writes in his book, “Going Solo,” when discussed publicly, the rise of living alone is often presented as an unmitigated social problem and a sign of diminished public life.
Of course, not everybody thinks this way.
“For decades social scientists have been worrying that our social connections are fraying, that we’ve become a society of lonely narcissists,” Klinenberg tells The New York Times. “I’m not convinced.”
And neither are a number of researchers. These studies begin to unpack the question of how being single can contribute your success in life:
Single people tend to have more time to themselves
Klinenberg also believes that, in the age of expanding digital media and growing connectedness, being single offers a clear advantage: more restorative solitude.
More alone time helps people discover who they are and what gives their life meaning and purpose, he explains.
“Living alone helps us pursue sacred modern values — individual freedom, personal control, and self-realization — whose significance endures from adolescence to our final days,” Klinenberg writes.
Single people tend to spend more time on leisure
Whether conducted in solitude or with other people, singles tend to spend more time on overall leisure activities than married people.
According to the BLS, single people spend on average 5.56 hours a day on overall leisure activities, compared to married people, who spend an average 4.87 hours a day on leisure.
Broken down even further, single people spend on average about three minutes more a day participating in sports, exercise, and recreation than married people, about 16 minutes more a day watching TV, and about 15 minutes more a day playing games and on leisurely computer use.
Single people report experiencing more personal growth
As Business Insider’s Erin Brodwin previously reported, in a study of 1,000 single people and 3,000 married people, single people were more likely to report feeling that their life has been a continuous process of learning, changing, and growth and that they think it is important to have new experiences that challenge how you think about yourself and the world.
Single people have fewer legal liabilities
As LearnVest has reported, marrying someone makes you legally responsible for their financial missteps, whether that means assuming equal responsibility for their debt (“You owe how much in student-loan debt?!”) or becoming a part of lawsuits filed against them.
Single people tend to have less credit card debt
Single men tend to work fewer hours than married men
David Ramos / Stringer / Getty Images
The same study authors also found that single men between 28 and 30 work 441 fewer hours outside the home per year than do their married peers, while men between 44 and 46 work 403 fewer hours if they are single.
Single people tend to exercise more
Researchers from the University of Maryland found that men and women between the ages of 18 and 64 who had never been married tended to exercise more each week than those who were either married or divorced.
Another study found that married men were 25% more likely to be overweight or obese compared to single men.
Single men tend to be more generous
In another study highlighted by Brodwin, men gave an average of $1,875 more to friends when they were never married compared to when they were married.
Single people tend to sleep better
Getting a good night’s sleep is hugely important — and it’s much easier to achieve if you’re sleeping alone.
When we spoke to sleep advocate and Thrive Global founder Arianna Huffington last year, she told Business Insider, “There is nothing sacred about always sleeping together. This is an American romantic delusion.”
But old habits die hard.
As Salaky reported, a survey by Amerisleep found that single people get the most sleep — an average of 7.13 hours a night — compared to people in relationships, widowers, engaged folks, married folks, divorcees, and separated people.
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